Opinion/Resources/Teen Perspective 

By Teen Opinion Contributor Maggie Verdught

Photo: Pixabay

I’ve always thought that Valentine’s Day was a silly, commercialized holiday that often made both single and non-single people miserable. While I still believe that is often the reality, Valentine’s Day – and February overall – pose a great opportunity to talk about godly relationships.

It’s important to consider what God desires for His children, as we seek to honor Him in our relationships. This article will also include my own personal opinions and story of how I am seeking God in this area of my life. Let’s get into it!

A good desire 

If you are a Christian, you’ve likely heard your pastor speak about the importance of marriage, and what it symbolizes: Christ as the groom, and the Church as His bride. “For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior” (Ephesians 5:23). In this way, we as the Church await the day when Jesus will come and take His people to the place He has prepared for us. What a glorious day that will be!

Marriage itself is a good thing. God created it, and it is a good desire to have. Of course, as Paul says, not everyone is called to marriage. He himself was not! Yet many people are called to marriage, and that is a beautiful thing. I strongly believe that dating should not primarily be “for fun.” It should be a fun experience, but ultimately, it is also a learning experience that should lead you to your lifetime partner and best friend. Marriage is the ultimate goal of dating. 

The dangers of idolatry 

Like anything else in life, marriage can become idolized. This can happen for you whether you are single, engaged, or married! Idolatry is extremely dangerous because it consumes our mind – and our minds belong to Christ! When we give in to temptation, and set our minds on earthly things, we are living in the flesh; that is not living up to the calling by which we were called!

If I think, I wish I was married, then I would feel loved and desired, and be happy, I am deceiving myself. These thoughts are lies that Satan wants us to believe. When we live as though we are enslaved to the flesh, we cannot accomplish the work that God has for us. These mentalities are dangerous, and it is unhealthy to get stuck in a pattern of thinking and believing them. Rather than relying on the Lord in my life and making Him most important, I am valuing my feelings and circumstances more, which is wrong. I have greatly struggled with this recently! Not only with idolizing a romantic relationship, but in other areas of my life – how easy it can be to fall into the trap of lies that Satan has for us! 

This Valentine’s Day, I challenge us to celebrate the love that we have for one another – whether that may be in your marriage, family, or friendships – and especially our love for God. We rejoice because He has shown His love for us in the most beautiful, sacrificial way that allows us to spend eternity with Him, if we repent and believe. 

My personal opinion 

Unfortunately, I’ve always been someone you would identify as “boy-crazy” in certain ways. Even from an age as young as eight, I’ve desired male attention and affection. This has been detrimental to me, more so in my mind, thoughts, and emotions. I have never acted recklessly on whims of foolishness, but God knows my heart. I have obsessed over what others think of me, and tried to please people in my own way so that they will notice and like me. I’ve also been legalistic in my view of relationships. It’s good to have high standards, and I do – but when that becomes the subject of my obsession or over-analysis on “who might be the right person for me,” marriage has become an idol. 

In this area of my life, I am now seeking the Lord by simply learning to trust Him and love Him fully. When I give my dreams, thoughts, and emotions to the Lord, I am freed. It isn’t necessary to worry or seek human attention, because He is all I need! I am in complete dependence on Him. This isn’t easy to do, and I am working on it. I challenge you (and myself!) to seek God first in this area of your life – whether you are single, dating, engaged, or married! What are you prioritizing first in your life? How can you encourage your children or friends to seek God in this area? 

Summary

If anything, my hope is that this article reminded you of the contrast between the lies we believe and the truths that free us when we turn to Jesus. No matter where you’re at in life, He will always be able to reach you and change you with His love. 

Have a blessed week! 

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 

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The opinions in this article are specific to its author, and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the entire Counter Culture Mom team. 

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Maggie VerDught is a high school student who enjoys learning about culture, news, and politics.

She is passionate about sharing the truth, especially with her generation. Maggie loves to run, read, and write poetry in her spare time.

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